It’s the morning after the passing of one of your loved ones. You wake up to the blaring sound of my alarm. For a moment, you forget the grief. Your body goes through the motions—sitting up, stretching, reaching for your phone—before reality slams into you like a freight train. Your loved one is gone. But your boss expects me back at work. Emails were waiting. Deadlines loomed. The world hadn’t stopped for my grief, even though my entire universe had crumbled.
And just like that, you are reminded that your grief, trauma, and healing don’t fit neatly into our modern work culture. We’re expected to function, produce, and keep pushing forward, even when our minds and bodies are screaming for rest.
In an ideal world, people experiencing trauma—whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a violent experience, or a personal crisis—would have the time and resources to process their emotions. But our society doesn’t prioritize healing. Instead, we glorify resilience, rewarding those who push through pain rather than those who take time to heal.
“The modern workforce is woefully unprepared for traumatic losses in the lives of workers, despite the fact that such losses are inevitable at some point in most of our lives. For women starting families, rising rates of miscarriage and stillbirth since 2021 create a no-win scenario: disclose the loss and risk career setbacks, or stay silent and endure alone,” shares Melissa Saleh, former journalist and serial entrepreneur.
The modern workforce operates on a grind culture mentality: always working, always hustling, never stopping. In many workplaces, taking time off to process trauma isn’t seen as necessary—it’s seen as weak. And when there are bills to pay, families to support, and job security to maintain, many people feel like they have no choice but to suppress their emotions and keep going.
But trauma doesn’t just disappear when we ignore it. It lingers in the body, manifesting in ways we may not immediately recognize—chronic stress, anxiety, depression, physical illness, and even burnout. Unprocessed grief and trauma can lead to a plethora of issues.
One of the biggest issues is that many people simply don’t have the tools or knowledge to navigate trauma in a healthy way. Mental health education is still severely lacking in schools, workplaces, and even healthcare systems. Therapy remains expensive and inaccessible to many, leaving people to deal with their trauma alone.
For generations, we’ve been taught to “be strong,” to “move on,” to “get back to normal” as quickly as possible. This messaging is especially prevalent in certain cultures and communities, where seeking help is stigmatized and emotional struggles are seen as private matters. Instead of being encouraged to heal, many people are left to suppress their pain until it manifests in unhealthy ways—substance abuse, self-isolation, emotional numbness.
“Here’s the truth: if people are given tools, support and resources to work through their loss, process it in a therapeutic way, and even use it as a catalyst for personal growth, then they can emerge as dynamite new stars in the workforce. The ability to be resilient after trauma and loss is one of the greatest indicators of grit, which is one of the greatest indicators of high performance among individuals,” asserts Saleh.
Beyond work, social expectations also play a role in forcing people to suppress their trauma. In an era of constant connectivity, people feel pressure to appear fine, even when they’re falling apart. Social media encourages curated versions of our lives, where vulnerability is often met with discomfort or indifference. The expectation to be “okay” at all times is exhausting and unrealistic.
For those who have survived traumatic events, this pressure can be overwhelming. Many end up bottling their emotions until they reach a breaking point. And by the time they realize they need help, the damage has often already been done.
Saleh shares, “after losing my daughter at birth, I endured months of trauma therapy and grief counseling. It was the hardest period of my life, but it transformed me. I took risks, made bold decisions, and overcame doubts that once held me back.”
If we truly want to support people through trauma, we need to rethink the way we approach work, rest, and emotional well-being. No job, no paycheck, no productivity metric should ever take priority over a person’s well-being. We are not machines. We are human beings who experience loss, pain, and trauma. And if we don’t take the time to heal, we risk losing ourselves in the process.
So, if you’re struggling, give yourself permission to slow down. To feel. To process. The world will keep turning, but your healing is worth prioritizing. Because at the end of the day, you are not just a worker. You are a person. And your pain deserves space to be acknowledged.
